Sunday, September 21, 2008

The World is Coming to an End

At least according to the news.

I can't turn on the television without getting really really depressed about something. I'm worried about houses being in foreclosure (I don't even own a house), I'm worried about the fact that the FDIC insures up to 100,000 dollars, it doesn't seem like enough (I have much, much, much less than that in my bank account), I'm worried that the fed will drop interest rates (?? this might benefit me through my loans), I'm worried about what will happen if there's a bail out (my taxes might increase!!), and what will happen if there isn't a bail out (eek!)...

When I think of my day to day life, it hasn't changed much. My house is near my school so I really don't drive very often, cutting down my transportation expenses as gas prices soar. I live on a medical student diet of Diet Coke, Pasta, and Noon Conference food- my food costs have not increased significantly.

My day to day life has not changed in the slightest. I'm broke, I'm scavenging for free food, I don't drive very often, I'm "paying to work..." yet I have this sense of impending doom. The whole world is falling apart. It's only a matter of time before I go down in flames.

And that's when I turned the channel.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

The Name

So, Emily Forest isn't actually my name- It's not that I'm ashamed of my illness; it's just that it's probably better not to advertise. Especially given my position as a medical student. If I ever become a world famous _________ then I wouldn't try so hard to hide it. But, right now I'm in a position where I, like all others in medical school, have to prove myself, have to come off as professional, able to handle pressure, enthusiastic, trustworthy... all of those adjectives they put on the evaluation sheet next to check boxes indicating "rarely observed" "sometimes observed" all the way to "always observed." And aside from not being professional, able to handle pressure, enthusiastic, trustworthy, you'd better not piss anyone off, particularly on certain rotations, such as ________ (it may be different at different schools- fill in whatever is relevant to you), or you'll end up with a check in the "rarely observed" box.

So, anyway, the name. It's actually my "porn name." One night at summer camp, after "lights out" when we were technically supposed to be sleeping, one of the other girls asked each of us the name of our first pet and the street we grew up on. Basically, if you combine these two entities, you get your "porn name." And, it's supposed to be something like Peppy (your first dog) LaRue (your childhood street). My first pet was named Emily, and I grew up on Forest Street, so I came up with Emily Forest.

And, that is the name I write under. So I can be enthusiastic, together, and trustworthy on the wards.